Lipstick and nerves #096

A Christmas networking tale of sorts

I was looking forward to the Christmas drinks at my Financial Planner’s—the same firm I merged my financial planning business into way back when, nearly eight years to the day.

Nerves

So why, when my lovely friend and ex-colleague Tommy emailed to say he looked forward to seeing me and no doubt I’d recognize a few faces, did I freeze? And start to feel anxious. No longer just a guest, I felt something else.

Don’t get me wrong, I have real affection and respect for all our clients and business partners. But as I thought about the evening ahead, I was transported back to a time of busyness, responsibility and service—a time when my role was to serve our clients and team, shouldering, along with my lovely business partner Linda, the wellbeing and happiness of others. Never quite able to relax properly and enjoy the moment.

As I approached the drinks I was nervous. So much so I had to stop for a cheeky livener on the way.

Networking, not

But when I arrived, no one would ever have known. I did what I’ve always done: put my lipstick on, threw my shoulders back and walked in smiling and oozing confidence. Which is exactly what I used to do when networking.

Only this wasn’t networking in the traditional sense. It was meeting old friends—people I had worked with and known for years, people who had trusted me with not only their money but their hopes, fears and dreams. And it was so much more enjoyable. Circulating around the room with champagne in hand, chatting and laughing, it was wonderful to see our old clients and share stories and life experiences.

Nerves are funny old things, aren’t they? I’ve learned that nerves and excitement are basically the same physical response—both trigger the Sympathetic Nervous System. The difference is in interpretation: nerves focus on threat, excitement on opportunity. These days, I try to reframe my nerves as excitement by telling myself, “I’m excited,” which redirects that energy into positive action. Or I just use good old-fashioned denial and don’t think about what I’m going to do until I’m in it.

You

As ever, I’m interested in you. How do you deal with nerves in social or work situations? What are your tricks, tips or thought processes? Do drop me a line—I’d love to hear from you.

Wishes, appreciation and thanks 🌲

Anyhow, enough. It just leaves me to wish you, my lovely reader, a wonderful holiday break. Whether you celebrate Christmas or not, whether you’re with family, friends, or hunkering down alone, I really, truly appreciate you reading my words each week. It’s such a thrill when you write or comment, or tell me when we bump into each other how much you enjoy them. Thank you.

And remember: you’re never going to be any younger than you are today. Nor is the person or people you may spend this festive time with. Enjoy every single minute. None of us know how many more we may have.

Until 2026, my friends.

Ruth x

Ps this blog has nothing to do with the photo of Cyd, the Mini Schnauzer, I just couldn’t resist it ;-)