I used to be wishy-washy…now I’m not so sure #048

In praise of changing your mind

Growing up, even into my 40’s and 50’s, I was in awe of people who had strong views and opinions – whether politics, religion, behaviour, investment strategies, life choices, basically anything.

To my ears it sounded confident, intelligent, impressive.

I doubted the veracity of my loosely held views. I bemoaned the fact I couldn’t eloquently articulate facts and arguments whether as a conversation starter or in response to someone else’s opinions.

I thought it was because I wasn’t bright, well read or intellectual. Thoughts compounded by an ex-boyfriend lauding his university education over me and telling me I had ‘s**t for brains’ – charming.

Wishy washy is a strength

As I have got older, I realise my inner talk was wrong. I now see my ability to listen to another’s views, consider the other side of the argument and change my thinking if warranted is not ‘wishy washy’ - it’s a strength.

As a Chartered Financial Planner my views around investing changed when I finally understood how investment markets worked. Turns out investment success is rarely down to skill and judgement, more down to having a philosophy and a process. This caused me to rethink the investment strategy I recommended to my clients. Inevitably some clients questioned my new approach and were averse to change. Yet not passing on my new learning because I didn’t want to unsettle or ruffle my clients would surely have been a dis-service.

Being open to new information or evidence when it clashes with an established or deeply held view is hard. Not changing a view in spite of evidence to the contrary because it may make you look, perish the thought, wishy washy or fickle may feel difficult. Yet, if the new belief has solid foundations, imparting that on others is surely a gift.

What to believe

I try to keep an open mind while differentiating facts from story, which is challenging when story and words are such powerful tools. Sometimes I wonder if I'm missing something, especially when seemingly intelligent people double down on views opposite to mine. I find myself trying to see issues from different angles, putting myself in others' shoes to understand how they've reached their conclusions.

In these 'post truth', unfact checked days (when did we stop calling this telling lies?), and times of polarising debates, this becomes even more important. Ironic I should be posting this on the day of Trump's second inauguration as President.

Just imagine if our politicians, leaders and scientists had the humility to accept when they got opinions or decisions wrong. Just imagine if they were championed and not lambasted by the opposition and press for doing so. I'm pretty sure we would be living in a less toxic media, political and religious environment.

You

Wisdom isn’t about having all the answers. Ask questions, keep learning, keep growing. See nuance. Our ability to change our minds when presented with new information isn’t a weakness. Strength lies in being able to say “I’ve learned something new and I’ve changed my mind”.

I write this in praise of anyone else who struggles to identify or articulate their beliefs. I haven’t got this nailed. I have to remind myself to be curious. To read more widely. To not get sucked in by the loudest voice or a slick delivery. To change my mind when the evidence calls for it - difficult when doing so might disrupt my comfortable life and world view. It’s easier to be comfortably numb.

How about you, how do you reach your views? How do you determine your truth? What have you changed your mind about recently and what caused you to do so?

Do drop me a line, I’d love to hear from you.

Until next week my friends

Ruth x

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Photo credit Engin Alyurt, Unsplash